Who says that after um a wild two years, my twitch contract ends today i'll see you guys february 8th? The next chapter chat small leak, it's like yes, this is this, isn't a this is a leak about okay, this is actually. This is a decent story. This is the story, so, whenever i reason with twitch right there's a lot of talk, there's a lot of negotiations. Whatever right it was it was.

It was a continuous process and negotiations took so long. Okay, that um my contract had already ended, and i signed youtube counting the minutes until the juicers twitter one month like he's provisional, like uh like like stalling contracts or whatever, because it took a while right. I'm here excuse me, i don't think this this um, i don't know what this means to her, though that hers is over over because technically, if i didn't say those the sub button would have disappeared literally, like someone would have disappeared again, wait. Why don't you post this, which was it today? Can you give her a call? Are you live yeah, yeah, you're purple on my discord? Oh no um! No! Okay, listen wan na hear a secret yeah, i'm here for leaks because everything's blowing up and you're you're you're um, i'm sorry! I saw you tweet.

It says i'm not streaming on periscope after a while two years later it ends today. The next chapter i'm missing, but yeah, the but you're here now in the tsunami, yeah yeah, because it's the last one: okay, okay, dude, okay, no i stole your mic is that? Okay, i heard you use this mic uh, the short sure you should just hear it on my stream. It's really good wait. What mike, why the city um! I don't know what it's called.

Well, i don't get it. You still want wait. You saw my mic. Show me no just go to my stream.

Oh yeah. I think that's um. What is it this one yeah, like a was it that? Can you hear this? One show me yeah. I think it's uh, it's not one um! Oh! No.

They just want to hear what my teammates hear in my game, because i don't i don't use my actual mic all right, i'll show you i'll show you what um mikey mates here hold up um. Let me test this out real fast. I was supposed to be my kill. Oh i got you, i know about it.

Sorry, there's a vacuum too. Can you hear this wow that's dead? Can you hear this? Is it bad? That's like medium dang, it's not like a bad bad. Oh actually sounds pretty good. Hold on close my door close my door.

Let me just test this out: hey, let me just fix it back, um, okay, um! No! No, i wasn't i wasn't going for like for like conor installed was i i was one of your views or not because i was curious, but i feel i feel like um. I i want to corner you into like making a leak by accident. I'm not stupid, like that. Oh no, it's all good! Not because i gave you some intel.

I can give you one more piece of intel. Oh yeah, yeah uh. It's not tick-tock either. I will not be streaming on tiktok gaming um.

You know my my negotiations. Weren't over yet and my contract ended and i signed up really. I signed a one month. Two times you signed a one month, two times yeah, because otherwise i was going to go live and my sub was going to disappear and i was going to go to zero subs, that's kind of how it works.

Wait. So do you not have a contract right now? Yeah? No julian! You don't have a contract right now. Yeah, i'm gon na go down. Yeah have a good one.

Now it's like a long contract or just like a one month, two time it ends in 14 months. I think 14., oh nice, so you're on twitch for another 14 months, um yeah, i think so and and then and then it's uh um and then it's tick tock time anyways. I'm sorry, i'm in the middle of the game. So no! No! No don't care too! Well, okay, um! Well, interesting, interesting! You don't you don't seem too puzzled about it.

No i've just been through too much to really give a about what platform i even like stream on. You know. Oh okay, i see how it is yeah, it's like it is what it is at this point, interesting yeah, just as she hates us. No, you know.

Twitch chat is very cool, listen, okay, let's say in other universities you were to leave. I haven't agreed and i'll give you the goals. If you want on my side as well, you were leaving how much, how much would you charge me to remove everybody off your autos and only auto host me? How much would you offer 20k a month for how many months indefinite, no because, like you, could just decide when not to do it anymore? Well, if i were to do 20k a month, you would get the majority of the publicity like the first month. So if you just said no to the other months like it wouldn't be worth it, so i would need at least like a six month.

12 month deal, i would say okay, then i would do 12 months. I'd probably ask for 25. sure, as long as it's legal five you're doing business. What is that, like one percent of your income trillion dollars? Something like that stuff like that? Something like that crumbles from the empire doesn't even make a dent in the wallet bro? Absolutely not not even a dent, obviously it'd be like um, oh where's, pokey.

Oh, do i care anymore because i'm watching this this chad, so they kind of get like roped in people these days. They call me um, you mean giga, not right. It's giggle right! Yes! Yes, no it's. I said you guys for so long until somebody corrected me, then i think i'm attached to the word.

I like it. Yes, they need you stay for the fans they. What about what about she needs you stay for the streamer mindset. Why should i stay when they can stay real fact? I i thought that long enough.

I think i think the only thing that matters it matters is that the content isn't eroded to what true it should be, because a lot of platforms at this point are viable. Yeah, honestly, even if you don't tweet anymore like you could, because you could always interact in different, more modified ways, literally just tweet unless on facebook, it's kind of different is that i, like i like looking at chat and saying this guy is dumb. This guy's dumber but i'll, be sitting on facebook to go up and pull up and say: hey you're, dumb click his profile and see like his family and his house and his car with his license plate on it, and it's full. Oh my god, that's true.

There would be so much less harassment on facebook. If i went there like, like you, jonathan rogers of one through fall street with one two f, two, eight nine imagine the content. I could make of me calling people's moms or messaging them on facebook. Jesus they're talking in my chat, that's better than unbanned forms.

I would do. I would do that in a heartbeat christ. This is the new matter. Meta yo! You played all right, um yeah, we're right here, huh! Okay, you want to play sometime nice, you um, oh over you, you um, you didn't go to one wait! Sorry, what you doing good, what you having uh you've been fun these days.

Are you happy? Oh yeah, i'm top bragging. I'm oh, like am i happy. Am i having fun anything yeah? Are you like happy um? You know it's kind of like on and off. Oh that's not.

I think my is happy. It's always on the way. Uh, it's always from good to like crazy goodness. I really get the answers in the middle downwards.

Okay, talk to us, then what's happening, it's uh! Sorry, sorry! Sorry, it's complicated yeah! So i mean things were i mean you know, there's been a lot of going on yeah yeah, so things were okay. Initially, when everybody was like being nice about it, but then there's still like a lot of uh residual residual harassment residual, especially on tick tock, it's kind of freaky, so i mean that's, that's obviously hard to see. But what do you know switch platforms or something um? Yeah, you know i've never really had a phase where the residuals um like never never left ever that that affected um the nature of the context at the end of the day, um, if the nature of what i do remains the same. It's not that big of a deal right, but at some point, if you look at chat and there's a chat, it's there's always dog of a certain type of dog and never leaves that's really annoying.

I kind of get what you mean, but also, i think, it's hard to explain. The type of i get like it's very, very weird, yeah yeah, it's a little more leveled up than like somebody complaining about about the quality of the content or like yeah like these people, don't stop and they're relentless and they're really weird, and they try to do Everything like they try to find your personal information. They try to on how you look on the content, a lot of stuff that, like you, can't control it's just uh yeah, it's just weird yeah! That's really creepy, like obviously every content creator, every streamer like you get hate, especially if you're like as large as you are, where i am, or whatever yeah, but the ones that really hate girls. Oh they're, weird they've, never seen a kid in their life, not a single titty and it drives them crazy, they're next level, i don't know, no, i'm having a video was too far for you.

You see a lot a long time ago there was a big woman people that thought i was uh. I was a a legitimate homophobe because something i said to somebody right, i mean well as it was gon na it's gon na it was kind of and i'll still admit to that it was kind of yeah i'll, be honest, um. I i would get a lot of dms right and obvious, even even even if they tried that to be mean, it sounds like they, they kind of they kind of couldn't like they were still kind of nice. They were like saying stuff, and i was like oh okay, but i i don't know why.

Though it um like it like like it was it it wasn't bad, but it kind of like faded away pretty fast. You know yeah. I thought the same thing would happen to me too, because, like i didn't do anything specific, it was more so someone else doing something to me uh, but still here still here so such is life yep um. I wish someone would tell those people to like chill the out, because obviously they're not gon na, listen to me so um and then you have, and then you have the types of andes like in my chat right now, they're like relax.

What are you gon na? Do cry you're an adult the stop talking about it, andy's yeah, but i think these will uh sometimes understand it that um, just because you can make something negative doesn't mean that it has to or should be okay with it being negative. So that's kind of like it yep you say: oh, this is tragedy, complaining about it. Yeah i get it. It might be sound like a snowflake, but it's like a lot all the time, especially when it's mixed with all the things that you like doing and you're passionate about it's always tainted, but it's by by the garbage.

It just makes things not as fun when things that are meant to be really fun and it's like it erodes so fast. It ruins streaming for you and it's like dude. I just want to talk to my chat. My people have fun things things eroded.

I think that's when you lose focus, i think that's when people um quit or do stuff less yeah. Actually you had a really really good take once that i was really impressed by which one i hate jet um. You said something like someone was comparing the amount of female streamers in the top 100 or whatever to male streamers, blah blah, and you were like something you guys don't understand - is a lot of girls can't stream as long as guys, mainly because they receive so much Harassment that they need to take breaks more often for, like their mental there's, a lot of reasons why that is like that um, i think inherently um people can still develop about it right about they could quantify uh uh or qualify samples behaviors as one or another Label, but the reality of it is, is that it's a male dominated platform or stream as a whole is just mostly male dominated, there's more male to do it by insane margins and also but viewers they're just more in numbers right, that's true! That's that's! Just kind of kind of how it is yeah, so it's already skewed one way: yeah and then and then it's weird because people like to on like the minority that it's skewed against, you know yeah, yeah and and yeah exactly so. It's like um yeah yeah.

It's what so, i usually make good comparisons with um with um, with that. I'm just surprised because, like as a popular dude for you to understand the male experience decently. Well, like that's just surprising me good on you well, okay, i think a hint of that is um playing games as a french game, while playing halo like um. When i was a kid i i had learned, i was learning english through zelda and and other games and i'd play halo right and i would play high-rank games right.

You know i was pretty good at the game and hello too and outro to talk right and i would get on by everybody right, but didn't make fun of like how i'm saying stuff, but i was good at the game right. The only reason i was communicating it was to win, make sense sure i would never really stop or like feel bad about my accent or whatever right, because all i wanted all i wanted to do was to win, but i could definitely tell how somebody who would Speak french as a main language would stop communicating because it would always make somebody would always make fun of them um for speaking weird, so make sense. So i understand i like it see, i didn't care as much, but i could understand it. If somebody did care right it would, it would make them less prone to continue doing it and then once you, what do you mean continue doing it talking or communicating like? It's always getting on, though they would be less likely to go in games and communicate because they're, just gon na get on they're, just they're being conditioned resident, sleepers, yeah, doing condition right yeah.

So i was more strong on that side, where i could take everything. Give a because my ultimate goal was to win because i'm very competitive, but if somebody was not as competitive and you play games for fun, i could definitely tell that they would have way less fun. We just ruined it for them. Yeah mm-hmm, okay xqc is, i just want to explain to people because they're like question mark he's explaining how for him when people were on him, maybe for his accent he was able to put it aside because he's really competitive and he just wanted to win.

But he understands how, if someone, for example, a girl is just playing games casually like why would like they have no reason to put something aside. That is just not enjoyable and not fun, because other people are ruining it for them, yeah, so yeah. So that was a that was a member of the comparison right, because i feel like if you're a woman and you play you, play games, competitive, competitively and you're very competitive and you're always matched with it. You know mostly males right and you get out for being a girl all the time right.

If the only thing you get is winning winning right a lot of times 99 of the things that we're going to say, you know it happens, you're going to put them aside, you're just trying to win, but even if your focus is not like, you want to Have fun you're just trying to have fun like that? That means less fun. Getting a bunch of insults is less fun and a story doesn't matter what it is or how it is getting insulted is just uh generally there's a thing that makes things less fun. So then you're less likely to do it. Let me say one other thing: i am someone who, if you watch my stream a lot like you know, i'm competitive too.

Once someone starts talking, i actually try hard and i think that's fun like being competitive can be very fun, but when people are harassing me or on me for things like, if someone's on me for playing bad, i'm like okay, whatever i'll, probably just banter with them Back but if someone says like weird sexist to you, that stuff is cringe, it's like, i think it's really cringe as well, not just cringe, but also like it's upsetting, that's stuff that nobody wants to see her here. Yeah, it's really cringe because you're playing the game. It's all about the game. Are they things that are completely unrelated and they're trying to apply it like in the game? It's just it just like kind of takes you back like it's just weird yeah, it's stuff that like um, it takes your mind out of the game.

If someone's like yo pick the slack up you're the bed you'd be like ah like and then you would try to play better or do whatever you know what even say: you're gon na my mom, it's okay, but once someone's like you piece of you're, probably fat And ugly and personable and stuff that is like very gendered that stuff is like it just makes you feel weird you're, like oh ew, like we're not even talking about the game anymore, yeah yeah, when i was playing hello, i would always i will. I will always get um um, frenchy, frenchy little boy or um drop your balls kids. At the up that that's like the two lines. I would get right, shove them frenchie and drop your balls.

I don't know what that means. Nothing is they? What does that mean? Jugger balls, i don't know what that means. They would just spam that that is a little weird champ yeah i was a squeaker. I was a squeaker yeah, it was.

It was kind of it's not weird. I i didn't give a though, because at the end of the day i mean i was higher ranked than than them their older brothers and their dads. So i doesn't really matter that much facts same and facts, but it still does matter because it's um, i guess for me, i have like a what would you call it a little bit of like a like a justice boner like when something is just wrong or Like unfair, i hate that so when i know someone is saying something that they just shouldn't, or that is unfair, like that they wouldn't say to someone else who was doing as bad as me that pisses me off yeah yeah. I could get that yeah.

I could get that yeah. For me, this is less relatable, because i can't think of one thing that that people do that makes you feel like that exactly so. So, even though i'm trying my best to relate no that's okay, even you saying that you can't relate is at least validating the fact that i'm having a real and unique experience. That is unfair to me in some way.

Does that make sense yeah, as opposed to saying just because i can't relate it, means it's not true. If anything you're saying like, i feel for you, because i can't relate that's fair yeah, yeah um, well well, what about when you're chilling off stream and you're just hanging out? Are you happy you go a? Oh sorry. Did you say something um yeah? So whenever you get you get spaghetti, would you rather get a bolognese or like a like a meatball normal, like uh, like tomato sauce, marinara type of thing? My favorite is like there are meatballs, but it's meat sauce too. So it's kind of both oh yeah yeah and there's melted cheese in with the spaghetti.

That's how my that's my mom's spaghetti. It's so good! What kind of cheese, though we're gon na make the cheese? Oh, my god, i'm so glad you asked it's like the marbled cheese. You know when it's not just like cheddar or mozzarella. It's marbled rejected.

I think that's what it's called yeah yeah yeah and it's like. Oh, my god, that's sage, sorry, and then she shreds that she takes that cheese and then she shreds it and then she mixes it in with the spaghetti. So it's melted and part of the spaghetti sauce yep see that's what i get when i get like a mom's spaghetti right want to give something, what it's a little bit like fancier. In its nature, i like having it um more coarsely, grated fresh yeah.

I bought it that was good. That was fired, no no, i would buy, though i found another reason where i always have a a slice. Parmigiano try easy it's just it's just it's wicked insane. Okay, sorry, some of this one yeah that does sound wicked insane yeah.

It is uh what about when you're hanging out off stream? Are you happy um? Usually, yes, the last couple weeks have been tough um, fair enough, but usually you can decline. You can decline my answer by the questions. You want. Oh no, it's fine, but yeah.

I mean that would be my answer. Usually i'm totally fine, like i'm enjoying my life, but when you know it's like you know that saying curiosity killed the cat like when you know people are saying things about you, it's hard not to check mvp yeah anyways. What about you how's the life off stream? Pretty happy? What do you have happy? I'm like i'm, not gon na lie sometimes sometimes, but when i'm, when i'm kind of chilling it's like a late night like like sad hours, i'm not kidding i'll um i'll. Take the keys and i'll eat a snack while playing a mobile game in my car.

Let's go what mobile game i've been addicted to tft it's the only thing that makes me happy. Um, wait, that's a little sad, but you know still tft hearthstone. Sometimes you play tft, oh yeah, but i'm dog yo. You should try garen protector comp very fun, very easy, boring.

You always hit uh time cap and it's sleeper. Do you know what you always said time limit and then, when things start spitting up or whatever your rounds are long and boring if you're like wait, what do you mean time limit whenever the the timer of the battle runs out and then your characters go like All inside and they attack faster. Do you mean like ascension? I think that's what it's called wait in tft yeah in tft. Oh you mean overtime, oh okay, yeah and that's boring.

I like like most more like bursty cop whatever. Ah, i just like winning yep. I can only play one comp. If i started playing random and losing i'd be mad.

I usually get bored and fall asleep before i even get to my uh, my legendaries and i'm pretty good at the game too. I'm pretty decent and i'm not kidding. I i a lot of games. I don't even finish them because i kind of just fall asleep.

I would love to play against you. That sounds great yeah. I don't know i it's. I like.

I love ddftft i'll log in. I can't wait to play the game, i'm like eight rounds in and like that's like. That's that's my tft for the day boys like i'm out, and i am winning no doubt about it at least top four. You know when you get top four and it does that little gold celebration thing: um, you're, gon na notice, this next time on the very round where there's only four players left it does this like gold celebration thing, i think oh um yeah, like i said i I'm usually asleep by then i get top four um, i'm pretty dead in the game, though i feel like i like, i'm like um, like silver rank or something so i can play any comp and and it'll work out, but because i feel like um at these Rainbows are so so dumb that everyone's the same comps that they see or met or whatever, but then you realize that nobody's nobody's picking a strong club or a certain type, and you just rush that and you can get like uh high high.

I tear characters really fast yeah. I guess you could and i feel like in lower elo yeah people either do go the popular comp or they just do random. Like i see a lot of that people just going comps that aren't really comps, you know yeah yeah. Oh yeah: well that was interesting, um! Oh, what about a pet? You got a pet or not.

I do. What is it? You have a chat. Are you gon na get really really cute? Are you gon na get mores, um, i'm thinking of getting another cat? Actually, yeah, okay and how old are you? I am 25. you're, 25 too right, i'm 26, i'm older than you boober, wait.

How am i older than you because you're ancient yo, i i i knew you were a streamer. I know you streamed right when i was playing league and i was like i was like 16 at the time or like seven, you were probably 17 18 yeah. I started streaming yeah. I was like 17 18 yeah.

Damn did you want to be a streamer back? Then, when you watch stream, um yeah, really not really, i didn't want to entertain it. I didn't want to entertain yeah, not really anywhere anyway. I could or breach my own breach. That's fine yeah, my own breach.

The bridge is just too basic. What is that? The longest term goal that you know that you want that is in your head? This is going to sound weird, a kid. You want a kid someday, not really really like. Are you sure you don't want a kid? It's so much though it really is that's true, but here's how i imagine it.

Okay, there's so many cool things we can accomplish in life. You know you've accomplished plenty, i've done a thing or two and i'm sure we're gon na do more, but then someday, there's gon na be nothing left except having a kid. It's gon na be the only way to continue. Oh no you're, not wrong yeah whenever, whatever the goals aren't goals anymore and they're, just mirages yeah yeah, but as long as there's goals right, i i could never in good conscience, split towards what i what i want to do and what i have to do.

I'd be too conflicted, and i couldn't in good conscience, justify myself just by myself doing something that i have to compare something that i want to. I want to do this. I want to pursue a certain goal. I want to be part of this.

I want to spend i'm doing that, but i need to take care of the kid i need to take care of that see. Yeah. I want to reduce the needs to do something to a minimum and maximize the wants. Yes, i totally know what you mean.

I had this problem and i had to talk to my therapist about it a lot. Actually, my therapist is dr k and he diagnosed me with a case of the shoulds. Have you heard of that? No! What is that the shoulds? I have a very, very severe case of the shoulds i showed initially than that yeah like i always do what i think i should do not what i want to do, but what i should that's the case to the shirt. What about copper mines, though? How often do you compromise okay anyway, so because i knew that that was the case.

I started to say it, and now i, oh, my god, sorry and now i basically only do because i want to okay - or i do my best make - makes sense. Yeah i'd like to give a bit of a good mix, i like to layer it i'm like a layering one. I get what you all do a certain amount of shoulds and a certain amount of uh uh want and i'll layer it and sometimes i'll. Just do more and and and and sneak a lot of wants, or sometimes the opposite, that's fair! I just um.

I feel like i've done so many shoulds for so long that now i'm just like it only once you know what i mean and then at some point i'll get to a healthy place where i can balance. But right now i got ta focus on me. You feel yeah yeah, i mean yeah. It's like uh, see that's when, whenever you put stuff that you can't shy away from like a kid, then it gets like really.

I would never want to neglect or feel conflicted about spending more time or doing the right thing for another human being that i'm responsible for yeah. I get what you mean. That's why it's easier to not have kids for now, but listen, we're only 26 boomer, but i'm still 25. So i've got time.

Do you feel yeah yeah? Well, look! I'm just this would be one chinese very privileged privilege. It's not it's about privilege. I think it's about ideals is that when you, when you can do something and when you can arranging a certain way, take full advantage of it. If you, if you can 20, have less helper compromises strive to compromise less.

Does that make sense sort of so yeah? We're talking about our perspective and yet there's less to compromise for right, there's less government's form. So it's not privileged. It's nice, it's not freedom, yeah yeah, and i'm always thankful for that. That's why yeah you should only have.

Ideally, you should only have a kid when you really want to, because if you have a kid before you're ready to give up so much of your life for it and before you have that desire like it, could lead to you resenting the kid yeah you don't Want to hate your kid yes, i would ever want to have the mindset of i have to give up for the kid. Maybe the opposite: i'd rather understand as instead of losing or offering something something that i'm pushing something that i'm that i'm then i'm it's right. Oh more time to put in more time to do want to invest right in time to lose. That's something that you want to be excited for, fox god, damn anyways, um yeah! If you don't get done with this, you hang up the call.

I okay. Let's talk another time and play it was really nice chatting with you x, yep, i'm glad to hear life's gone, oh by the way. Where do you live now? I never know because i feel, like you move every other one. I i'm into that now, i'm in a pretty big place.

It's pretty nice, i mean. Are you in l.a yep, oh you're? Still in l.a wait, you should like do stuff with people. If you want um defensiveness uh. Well, anyone yeah yeah yeah go hang out with all my other friends yeah.

You like you could like have me hassan and miz on your stream. I mean missing in la but still yeah, don't you live close with um with the otv andy's yeah, okay how's, that like are they annoying pardoned uh how's it like? Are they like? Annoying? Oh wait. I don't live with the otv indies right now. No, but we do see each other a lot and no they're, not annoying okay, andy's everybody split up a little bit like i live alone and then yvonne, scara and toast live together and then jodie john sid and a few others live together.

Yeah. It's a lot! We're all in different houses, but we're a family at heart. You know what i'm saying yeah, i i'm not invited too much. Okay, i'm gon na i'm gon na.

Go then all right nice that was half productive fun, though give me tonight.