I don't think that a lot of men realize how scary just they are, what merry christmas sex qcn hi. My name is day yeah, yes, yeah! Imagine you said this. This looks like a very a very good video guys, guys guys. This is.

This is pretty good. I'm from new jersey originally and i'm a publicist here in l.a, hi, guys, i'm brett white and it says men and music to understand each other in film. I'm gabby and i work in film as well. I act hi everyone, i'm cory, a i'm from los angeles and i'm in advertising and recruiting.

My name is farhood, i'm born and raised in la and i'm a writer and a director. My name is joe 25 years old and a marketing coordinator here in l.a. Okay, this is a stuffed belly cooper, men and women - oh yeah, not to say that this is a like a sound fact or that you know there aren't exceptions, but i think you know men are they're they're built differently, they're they're, stronger um. Usually, i i can say yeah physically it changes based on like their race in general, like the like, where they're from and stuff like that.

But i think that women tend to sometimes be a lot more over emotional and where men tend to kind of respond. A little bit more stoically and that might not be the most like perfect way to say it, but i think, do you think that's a natural five months way that we are like we're born to be, or do you think that's how we're brought up? I think it's a mixture of both like this or it might just be how society is ingrained and they should react to certain things too. Yeah men are supposed to be this, like sometimes uncompromising, not unemotional person, whereas women are supposed to people, because if i speak, big trouble, sometimes that's obviously those categories yeah. If i speak in big trouble for sure, even as a man like you know how i approach, because it's short videos is like, oh, how can i fix this thing, whereas, like a lot of my my female friends are like like, i don't need to fix it.

I just need to listen to this person and um and like for me, like that's just not my natural impulse, oh wow, that just that was actually gon na work. There's so many men who people will say: oh yeah, men are always strong or always this or is that well tell that to a female ufc fighter would kick their ass. Oh, you know what i'm saying and they're also why i said there was exceptions very much. There are a lot of people who will say: oh women are always hyper emotional and then talk to a bleeding heart guy who's.

Just like the biggest most passionate person i mean so i just think generalization is always problematic. My husband is he's one of those guys that cries in like every movie. You know and like i love you, what a dumb take dude dude that was such a stupid ass, take dude that and i'm like a very assertive fiery person, which is like generally attributed you talk about averages. Of course you have to generalize.

It's just gon na happen. It's problematic that we think, like strength, is masculine problem. Solving is masculine. His argument is safe, too, is weaker than men, but that's not what the animals definitely i've experienced a lot of disadvantages, particularly in the workforce.

In my position, i'm pretty high up, i kind of sit on the right. You know right hand of the president, but it's just kind of interesting how i'm always left with all these. Like administrative tasks, you know what i mean and i'm like. Well, what about him and him and him and him and him, but it's just, i think it's natural for people to associate administrative work with a you know.

It's a feminine role, same uh. I work at a hardware store and which is i get looked over. All the time because i'm like hi, how can i help you and they'll go i'm not i'm going to ask this guy, like literally just or not even talk to me. They'll just walk right past me and go ask a man to touch on more like disadvantages.

Like just having to think, i think to be more conscious of a lot of things like people say like walking to your car at night or going for a jog or just any anything at night, really yeah guys if that's the job, it's it's the job uh. It's some some jobs and sometimes excuse me more women have them and some of the jobs more men have them. I think that's that's! Okay and thinking about it. I was like well, what is a disadvantage i thought back to when i was six seven eight and i was in the schoolyard, i mean no, i mean no and my friends started to police me because the girls weren't getting policed from what i understand the way That the boys were because the boys were being told, don't be like a girl, don't cry, don't share your emotions, don't show your feelings because i wanted to fit in.

I embodied those ideas. When i was considering this question you know. Do i have disadvantages based on my gender impulse was just no like, as as a white man who have raised in you, know middle class america like right off the bat. This is advantageous um, like lack of barriers.

I should say you have you have a lack of barriers for opportunity? Well, i just would like to let everyone know that i do not open my own doors. Oh thank you. So much do you think that men opened doors for women? Okay, come on give us something more controversial. Give us your actual answer.

You don't depend depends on what well i mean i don't know everyone opens doors for each other. People have like stuff in their hands or whatever yeah. I think you should open my door. Did you open the door? No dude felix is so annoying.

I will sit like i'll be standing there like shifting through my purse, he'll get to the door first and i'll be waiting for him to open it, and i'm like oh, like when we went to dinner yesterday or two days ago i was like. Oh, is it closed and he's like no and then i grab the door and it's open. I'm like oh, okay, you're, just standing there waiting for me to open your door he's so annoying. Okay, that's that that was.

That was not the question. Yes, it was not a controversial. You should be opening all my doors, okay huh. I think yeah, thanks for your tell input why you shouldn't open my door.

Okay, i open it when i think about it, but inherently okay. The question was, i don't open every door for everyone for every woman or men open the door. When i go to the store to anybody, i just do by habits, okay, right right, but it's not for women or men or whatever. For me, it's it.

It doesn't matter right, yeah, the question is, and you want to leave the door open for them. That's good! That's a good thing, but like yeah, i don't think that, like men need to be like rushing to open every single door, just because a woman is there see exactly. You know my problem, though, from what, when i after school, i used to go to you know, college or whatever, whatever it is, it's a jet okay. I would add this habit of always opening the door right and i started noticing it was like in 2014.

I guess, or whatever, for 15 okay every time i would open a door for a for women at a good amount of time, like about 50 percent of time. I get weird looks, people will always even say weird stuff like oh and they would look like, like i'm a creep or something, and it made me feel so uncomfortable that i stopped doing it right like i just kept getting like a really weird and i'm like Dude i'm opening the door man like is it is that big of a deal like i was trying to be nice, like it's just just very odd and people now i noticed. Do it even more frequently now you get like, like seven percent of the time. It's just very odd, like i don't know why people are like this response.

If i see a lady pushing a freaking, stroller she's someone, i might run in front of it open the door for her or some like old person, i'll run in front of them and open the door for them yeah. I guess it's stuff. When you look to somebody who's like aggressive or you, look like your physical structure, right looks mean like, like, i feel like. If you look mean and you're a nice person - and you want to help somebody when they're growing across the street you're gon na think you're gon na steal their if you're like oh man, can i can i take this off your hands and you wan na walk Them up the stairs, whatever, oh, no, no! No, i'm i'm good, i'm good.

Sometimes it was some lady lift something up up some stairs right and i was like: oh, don't worry, i'll, get you and she's like no, no, i'm, okay and and watch going upstairs like like, like. I should barely do it. I was like dude. I wasn't trying to yoke your man, like i don't know just weird yeah.

It is what it is. You can't blame people for a weird response in that situation either because yeah i get it if she's worried about her own safety, but yeah. Can i get a coke? It's please there. I think so seriously, though so, if i'm walking to, if i'm with a male uh, if i'm walking to a door, i won't touch the door yeah um.

However, if i do open the door, if i'm, if i'm with a man, i will not walk and touch the door in well, if i'm on a first date with a guy and i open the door, you could best believe me. Merry christmas mr.cow and chat you're gon na what i'm gon na find my way out of that date. If he's like walking, if you guys, are walking pace to pace next to each other and he doesn't open the door to be courteous, hell yeah bye! Oh, oh, my god, okay, okay, then, if then, if you do get into the restaurant, it's time to pay for the check man, i pay for you better reach. For that check too sami, say: we've had enough merry christmas by myself and there's people behind me, i'm keeping it open.

Whole family females males no problem at all, but if i am with a male i will not open the door. So you just stand there. Yeah look real stupid too, because they usually stand there like as a joke, and i'm like: where does that expectation come from um? I'm sure it was just the way i was raised for me as a guy like my instinct, is like you know how my dad taught me, and my brothers is just like you know, treat women with the utmost respect and honor. I feel like chivalry is just something that i'm like.

This is absolutely something i want to step into and to continue and uphold. I think that's like a really beautiful way. To put it, i also think it's not true, like that's not born out of like serve because she's up here. It's because we don't it's it's the opposite of empowerment! Reason why a guy doesn't think that you can you know what screw? That is is the same reason why they think they have to open the door or why it hurts why chivalry can hurt, because the idea that, like we have to protect - and we have to like - do things for them.

It translates it's equal to the idea that, because they are unable to she's saying that that we know that that men know the names of the screw because, generally speaking, i always feel pretty comfortable when i'm with the opposite. Gender, i'm the youngest and i have uh. Three brothers and i have a lot of male figures in my life, so i think that will influence my feelings on that. I grew up in a family full of women, literally mom had like three sisters, like all of them had pretty much girls until i was about 13., so 100 feel, like i'm comfortable with women being around me.

I'm a gay black man, so literally the community. Just for gay black people or just gay people in general, you always have like your best girlfriend. That's going to be there on your side, regardless of whether you just met them or whether you've known them for 25 years. I don't think that a lot of men realize how scary just they are and how many men just hanging out like feel like.

Oh that girl could literally kill me. Like that's a true thing. Come from a family. That's like has really strong female personalities.

She said. I'm sorry she said what i don't think that a lot of men realize how gary just they are and how many men just hanging out like feel like. Oh that girl could literally kill me like that's a true thing. Come from a family.

That's like has really strong female personalities. You don't doubt anything that they can do because they were the defenders of the family. They were the ones that raised everybody. They were the strongest people in the family.

So i don't i don't know i i understand you're in high school, i mean i in high school, like i was on the wrestling team. I was one of three girls on the all boy wrestling team and i was like yeah. This is awesome, like i'm one of the guys. This is cool, and you know one of the guys like held a knife to my throat like behind the bleachers at a game, and you know you, you want to be able to to trust and be like.

Okay. I don't know you so i'm gon na you know give me, give you my trust for a little bit and then all of a sudden you're. On top of me, when, when do i choose like who do i choose, and so it's like i've, never had that with a woman so um, i don't think i've always been comfortable and i am a very private person, and so i'm very intentional about the relationships That i build and about the people who i am vulnerable to, i wasn't always comfortable sharing my emotions, i think from childhood. To you know my mid-20s or so i think it was more of just like this, like let me bottle it up.

I'll share with a few people, but it wasn't something i would share freely and i think now, where i'm at is, i see true power and vulnerability absolutely to share and not fear, um. You know judgment or shame when i am strong in the way that i talk and just being strong people are like. Oh you're, angry you're. You know you don't make sense, i'm like no.

I make a lot of sense right now. I don't think this brings the end cells out. I don't really agree with that deck. Listen! Some of these things are really bad, though i'm gon na be honest, but from both sides very dumb ticks.

You know just the fact that i have an emotion, makes me unreliable in some way in people's eyes, like we can't have a woman running the the country. What if she's on her period, we'll go to war? Well, i haven't seen it yet. I i am only uncomfortable in how i am perceived, because i do want to be perceived as a competent person and somebody to be trusted. I've taught myself to become emotional, but from my family and from being a black person in america.

I don't think that i am comfortable being emotional. I feel like it's like me: losing control, it's me being vulnerable and i don't like being vulnerable to anybody unless i choose to, and i think that that's it's a sad thing because, like i should be able to cry whenever i feel like it, but i don't Or if i do cry like, i lost the family member last year and broke into tears and work as soon as i realized that i was crying, i stopped and i said i have to go home. I apologize i'm leaving right now and that's that's just how i had to respond to it and i don't think that's healthy, but it's something that i that that's just my personal experience when it comes to being a male, a black male in america yeah. I think it kind of goes back to just women being the most like approachable people that i can come to and talk about anything when it comes to me or just my experiences like the things i've had to go through they're a lot more understanding, and i Don't know i just feel safe.

My experience again with the opposite sex has been pleasant. You know my entire life. I've always felt comfortable. I've always felt understood.

I've always felt like i had a a voice. You know, even if it's not again the voice in the conference room, i always felt like i've always been well. I think, like as a general swathe like take looking at it. That way.

No men don't understand women and it's because we're looking at it as two different things like even the idea of being assertive, comes off as being a are you speaking from a personal place or a societal place, because i feel like you're, you speak from a very Like big place, instead of so it's all the same, because the question was like i not like society yeah do, i feel understood by men yeah. No, because they don't view me as an equal. Can i see a question in this space? Do you feel understood um? I feel understood equally by all parties great not, but but you know like i got ta start image bearers. You know image bearers of god and like that, we're equal and we're given these different roles to fulfill and when you see uh, two people dancing and it's a beautiful choreographed, equal dance, no one's out showing the other person.

But when it comes to like relationships with men and women like i feel like these different roles can be such a beautiful thing when done right, but can also be a disaster. If one person is, you know, trying to outperform or another person is taking advantage or overstepping, like you said, there's such a beauty in differences and in masculinity and femininity and it's important to have both in we need yourself picture uh. I like watching jubilee. I think i think sometimes some people have steak that are so bad.

It gives you a little bit of presents. Maybe i'm not that stupid. I think i think that's the let's take away. Sometimes i watch the videos i'm like you know.

You know i'm not that dumb. Somebody in this video is so bricked dude dude this guy or this girl is a bricked. I feel good tonight. You.